JACKSONVILLE, Fla. – Recent traumatic events involving young adolescents turning to violence further highlight the disturbing, continuing trend of mass shootings plaguing the nation.
On Thursday, a jury recommended the Parkland school shooter not face the death penalty. Instead, Nikolas Cruz must serve a life sentence without the possibility of parole. Thursday night, police said a 15-year-old opened fire in Raleigh, North Carolina, killing five, including an off-duty police officer.
The constant talk and coverage concerning recurring events such as these can take a toll on anyone, including children.
Kevin Petersen, a licensed marriage and family therapist with the Chronic Hope Institute, agreed there has been a lot to process in the past week and said people may be reliving some of the same feelings and concerns they previously had.
“It reopens the wound. The trauma of the initial event is stored inside our brain -- kind of like a file in a filing cabinet, and it gets locked away,” Petersen said.
Petersen said it is important to understand the symptoms of anxiety following these types of events. A few symptoms include racing thoughts, stomachaches, sleep issues and hypervigilance.
Petersen suggested parents or guardians reassure their children by talking to them at their level when speaking about these violent and traumatizing events. He said it’s best to ask open-ended questions like, “Do you feel safe at school” and “What can we do to help you?”
It’s always imperative to let children know they are not alone in their feelings.
“Share your reactions. Let them know that you have the same fears and anxieties,” Petersen said. “You don’t want to overwhelm them, but you want them to understand it’s OK. The big goal is to offer them help and then normalize asking for help.”
Petersen said one of the most important things is to know when enough is enough. Don’t be afraid to limit children’s exposure to these types of events on TV and social media and let them know you’re ready to step in and help.
“Put your arms around them and tell them you love them, that you’re here for them, and you want them to know that you’ll always be able to help them process this and work through this,” Petersen said.
Petersen also said families should never write off therapy as an option because finding a trauma-informed therapist who understands the different types of therapy is crucial.
“It really helps to reduce the pressure on the nervous system and bring people off the fight-or-flight-or-freeze environment,” Petersen said.
